Dog walk

I did my dog walk assessment today. I walked 2 dogs, Star and India. They were both great, but I found India easier to walk with, as Star was a bit "bouncy", and excitable. India was a black lab retriever cross, and Star was a golden retriever. I did well on the walks, and there's now only one more step before I might get on the list for a dog. I'm tired, but really happy.

Yay!

I'm coming off lithium. This is so great! It's been making me feel crap for 7 years now, and I'm going to finally be rid of it in the next 6 weeks. I have to cut down the dose from 12 ml to 0 ml by 2 ml per week. My brother's getting me a syringe to do this as we speak. My psychiatrist is pleased with how I'm getting on. I think the way I've been feeling this last 10 days or so was a blip, as I haven't relapsed. My nan's 90th birthday party was a turning point. I had to psych myself up to going, it was hard,but I'm glad I did, she had a great time, and I seemed to turn a corner in myself, and now I'm feeling a lot better.

Ugly bleeder!

I had a blood test on Monday. I'm used to these, I have them regularly. Unfortunately, this time,, the nurse nicked an artery, and I bled, lots. It was so bad, I felt light-headed. The nurse was very apologetic, and I'm not angry, it just wasn't very pleasant at all. On top of that, I'm not feeling well again. The voices are getting louder,I can't clear my head, and I just don't feel like me.

New social worker

It happened amazingly quickly. I can't believe anything in the mental health system worked so fast! I met my new social worker yesterday, and he was great. We talked for a long time,and he really listened to me. He's going to see me every 2 weeks, which is a refreshing change. My brother also met him, and was also impressed. Hopefully this will be a successful outcome to my disasterous relationship with social workers.

Finally....

I'm being given a new social worker. It's been about 9 months since I saw my old one. I've no idea what the new one will be like, I just hope he or she's reliable. I just thought I'd share my good news with the world!

It crept up on everyone nut me

I was talking to a friend about his depressive breakdown. HE found that it seemed to creep up on him, that he wasn't expecting it when it came. I feel almost the total opposite. My illness was obvious to me from the start, but nobody else noticed it until I was a total wreck. Its' strange how things happen like that.

On a more practical note, I've asked for a new social worker. I haven't seen mine since February, before I went into hospital. I'm not asking for much, just a bit of reliable support and contact. Hopefully something will come of it, I'm sick of being messed about.

No meds (again)

I usually collect my meds on a Monday morning. Because of the bank holiday, this changed, and someone was supposed to bring them round for me. Well, I waited all day Monday, no meds. By the time I realised they weren't coming, it was too late to phone. So, I spent a horrible night in pain without the gabapentin, so I didn't sleep at all. By Tuesday, the lack of anti-psychotics was starting to make itself felt. I was beginning to hallucinate visually, and the voices were getting louder and louder. As well as this, I was physically sick with the pain in my eyes. My brother phoned the hospital on Tuesday morning, planning to complain. He was passed from pillar to post, and finally the drugs were found. But, none of the CPNs were prepared to deliver them, so my brother had to go and fetch them. This isn't a long journey, but he was extremely pissed off that he had to do it.

By the time I got home I was a wreck. I took my meds, and slept for a long time, helped out by a new thing I've found to help me sleep. It's Dutch (unfortunately not available in the UK) and it's basically aniseed, which you dissolve in hot milk. It's bloody wonderful as far as getting to sleep is concerned, and it's also non-addictive. Anyway, I'm planning to really complain this time, as it's happened too often.